The Power of Chaos

So, I don't usually post on here anymore.  I might have to change that.  This is a little more...secluded.  This is good.  I need a place to post some of my more personal posts...like this:


People just don't realize that, deep down, I'm not so nice of a person.  People think that Jess is the bitch between us, but that's only because I usually don't see the point in expending the energy to be one.  Leave it to one person to start pushing me to the point where I'm going to have to use them as an example as to why you don't mess with my friends and/or my family to the point where I'm honestly becoming ill from the whole ordeal.  I hurt feelings.  I break bonds.  i wreck memories.  I do it with no remorse nor mercy.

I'd rather not delve into that.  It took me forever to leave that part of me alone...

I NOW HAVE A HOUSE!!!!  Now I gotta move all my shit in there.  Guh. XD

So, Jess and I close on the house on the 10th.  3 days.  Packing started: Me 0%.  Jess: She got some clothes separated.  We have until the end of the month to get this shit packed and moved and then this apartment cleaned.  This will NOT be fun.  On the plus side of things, I'm getting a pretty big merit increase at work. (read: 5% raise)

I hate moving.  I detest it.  Perhaps I'm jaded from having to move an average of one time per year.  Maybe. Nonetheless, I will be only pleased with moving into our own house once I'm actually moved into said house.  Everyone keeps asking me if I'm excited to close on the house.  I promptly tell them no.  They look at me strange and i continue about my business unless they ask me why.  Then I tell them how my living arrangements here in the Great Solar Basin has not exactly been the poster child of stability.

Anyway, I've got to go to work.  Take care everyone.  I'll be around, silently panicking about packing and cleaning this place before we leave.

REJOICE!!!!!

We will not be in this place for long!

We close on the house on May 10th

I'm still alive.

I'm still busy.

I'm getting a house in a month and a half.

I'm still crazy.

Questions? Comments? Snide remarks?

I hate not posting, or being able to post, for a long time.  I never know what to type. Coincidentally enough, this is what I want to type, so I guess I do know what to type.  It's like an Earthbound moment.  A "Hello.....and goodbye!" sort of thing.  

This post is basically to let everyone know that I'm not dead, and aside from cash flow problems, all is well.  Jessica's move went without a hitch, although her laptop burnt out and she went through a window like a Resident Evil zombie.  She needed 14 stitches.  It's funnier than it sounds, honestly.

Anyway, I hope all is well with everyone who even still bothers to check this thing.  Drop me a line if you want.  I SHOULD get back to you now that I have a library card and can get to the net.

Ya know, I love my parents. I really do. It still burns me up when they're right about something that I swear they're wrong on. Recently, it's dawned upon me that they were right once again. A while ago, they told me that one of my friends wouldn't be a friend forever, and that they'd just do something to hurt me and/or disappear from me completely. This was YEARS ago, like when I was still in high school. I didn't wanna hear it. Back then, I was still in contact with most of my friends, and all was cool. I couldn't really ask for anything more aside from being out of my parents house....

In hindsight, which, as always, is 20/20, I regret not listening. I have forgotten, over the years, how sharp, and deceitful, the blade of silence can be. I've also looked back and realized that my willingness to aid in situations has been superceded by selfish wants and feelings. This isn't just one situation, but an array of events where I, or people like myself, have put it all on the line, wore their hearts on their sleeve, and put themselves in danger, physically, financially, or emotionally, just to find out later that none of it really matters.

Perhaps I was naive in thinking that the dividends to helping the cause would be some sort of mutual trust that anything can be brought up and things can be worked out instead of hiding behind the cloak of silence. I wasn't aware that it was so comforting to cast away things, unresolved. I, apparently, was wrong, yet again. That's ok, however. That's fine.

Step by step, I rebuild myself, patching up holes from where, I feel, I've been ripped apart. It's time for me to visit the old man on the mountain top and recollect myself. Despite how calm and cool I am on the exterior, I've kinda been broken and I'm the only one who can completely fix it.

As some of you may already know, my Oldsmobile has been acting up. Majorly. To the point where I've been either taking the bus, or getting rides from people to and from everywhere. Well, recently, I received a little flyer in the mail, stating that I was eligible for a car loan from Earnhardt dealership. Normally, I just pass those offers off as bullshit, but this time, I took a chance to see if it was legit. The result? Well, I'm pretty broke for a long time, but I now have a 2006 Dodge Stratus! Well, let's go overtime!!!

Absilio Mundus